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“Do not stay here!”
Review of Telemachos Hotel

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Telemachos Hotel
Ranked #13 of 15 Hotels in Dassia
Flitwick, England, United Kingdom
1 review
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 9 helpful votes
“Do not stay here!”
Reviewed July 19, 2013

As i read a few reviews before I came here, I didn't expect much, but at the same time I didn't expect it to be as bad as it was. The only positive I can take out of this hotel was Derek the chef, I could always have a laugh or a chat with him and found he was the most pleasant out of all the staff in the hotel. I had heard a few things about Dimitri from a number of female guests (far too young for him) how he offered to take them to dinner, bought them drinks, harassed them in their rooms and various other things. I found the manager to be very rude and abrupt and after hearing several other guests complain, instead of apologizing for an obvious mistake, he then goes on the be very rude and on some occasions, throw people out of the hotel. On several occasions our balcony door was left wide open and other door unlocked, obviously done by the maids, as I double locked our door, to see when the maids had been in or not. As we were on the ground floor and right by the entrance, I wasn't very impressed! The food wasn't brilliant, it was very much the same everyday, but I can see on a small budget the chef did do wonders of what he was given. At the all inclusive bar, you get drinks in tiny plastic cups which you could have two sips and were empty. The man behind the "bar" was very rude and grumpy unless you gave him a tip or cigarettes. On one occasion my friend gave him a tip, so he could get some more watered down alcohol and he decides to take the money, smoke a fag serve the person behind us and then serve us. The rooms were disgusting, lights hanging off, no shower curtain until pestered to get one, no hook to hook the shower on, so proved very difficult and messy to have a shower. There was chunks of wall hanging off and mold everywhere. I think a week in prison would have been better than staying in that hotel! Overall I would not advise anyone to ever stay here, your better off sleeping on the beach. Trading standards or someone like that should go and inspect their hotel and it would be shut down with in an instant. Oh and one more thing, there were wasps nests in all the railings next to the childrens play area and only after catching us taking pictures of these nests, they then decided to do something about it. DO NOT STAY HERE

Room Tip: Choose another hotel
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  • Stayed July 2013, traveled with friends
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Helpful?
9 Thank Scott M
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
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English first
1 review
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 11 helpful votes
Reviewed July 18, 2013 via mobile

Everyone makes there own judgements however this is what we found.....
Arrival - we was net by the male owner of the hotel who told us to "sit" like dogs in the lounge whilst he made sure our room was clean, some miserable women then showed us too our room leaving the key in the door.
Room - first impressions were basic but manageable... How wrong we're we, the shower flooded every night it was used, there is a general build up of grease and scum on the walls on and around the taps and toilet, the ceilings have damp and mould and the lights above the mirror just didnt work handles on the bed side tables fell off and graffiti inside the drawers relating to 2002! Wardrobe was also falling to pieces and looked water damaged at the bottom, lights hung from the ceilings and plugs hanging out of the walls
Housekeeping -The bedding which was changed daily contained so many different stains and the spare pillows in the wardrobe were grim, the Maids left the balcony doors open on several occasions, and towels were changed if you asked at reception only and it is pretty much 1 hand towel as a bath towel per person (rumours are things were missing from lots of people's room too!)
Food - well were do I start this contained of chips, plain pasta peas and some sort of slop, all inclusive or not this is served to you one by one at a very long queue on a side plate- no presentation! Tap water is your option of drink and no deserts other than the occasional bit of melon on an evening, sausages at breakfast are hot dog sausages cooked to rubber!
Staff - what a miserable set these are! Unless they are tipped with euros or fags they don't have the time of day for you, unless your female, 16 or under and they come knocking at your door at 2am for a booty call (see you tube video, someone's mum is not impressed) tut tut Dimitri! Complain and the main guy threatens to throw the police and then just kicks people out (I know of 3 in the week I was there, and plenty threatened)
All inclusive - joke! Shuts at 930pm at the little window where it is one drink per person and these are served in tiny cups which are drunk before you get back to your seat again long queues! No ice cream or anything for kids between meals..
Staff are all sleazy and the night manager invited us back to his room whilst he was on shift claiming he had vodka! Bet that's not all you have!!
General - your located on the top of Mount Everest on steroids and in the heat it is just unbearable to walk up! The bins are at the front of the building and with the heat smell foul when walking past!! The sun loungers and pool furniture is falling to pieces and there was lots of children with cuts and bruises from the pool and small children's play area.

In general the hotel is poor the staff are horrendous,
arrogant and refuse to help or accept responsibility for anything wrong! Food is appalling and quite literally makes you feel ill

Dassia it's self is very derelict but away from hotel teleshittos the people are generally pleasant! The beach is a 15 min walk and consists of lots and lots of stones, no sand at all very painful to get in the sea, not much area to swim, lots of seaweed, do not book this hotel,
The best bit was my 11:55 flight home to Manchester yesterday!!

Best bit my 11:55 flight home back to Manchester this morning!!

  • Stayed July 2013
    • Value
    • Location
    • Rooms
    • Cleanliness
    • Service
Helpful?
11 Thank Vickihitccock
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.

Travelers are raving about these Dassia hotels

Doncaster, England, United Kingdom
1 review
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 8 helpful votes
Reviewed July 18, 2013

Me my boyfriend and are friends decided to book somewhere cheap and friendly. So we did not expect a 5 star hotel. On arriving at the hotel are taxi went up a rather steep hill to a very nice entrance to the hotel. That's where the nice bit ends!! Once inside the hotel we was met by a grumpy man who I explained we had paid to upgrade and he told me he had no record of this and wud not listen to anything I said. We was told to wait in a room which I later found out was the dinner hall. It had old grotty furniture and no air con. We was told to leave are bags and go for a drink as are room was ready but already I had a bad feelin and decided to stay with my luggage. Once are rooms were ready (I don't know why they tuc so long as they were filthy) we found are rooms to be disgusting. Two single stained beds we asked for a double. One bed had a hole in the middle.the bathroom was filthy the shower curtain was held on with string. I had a hair dryer but the pipe just kept fallin out so was no good to anybody.it was lunch time wen we arrived so we decided to see if the food was any better that the rooms.the food was worse!!!! I wouldn't feed my dog what they served.you qued up for 20 mins and was given the smallest portions ever if u dared asked for anymore (which we didn't even finish are first portion as it was horrible) u wud get a dirty look and have to que again for 20 mins! After eating that once I was poorly the next day.we couldn't eat there crap again so had to eat out every night for the rest of the holiday. Near the pool was a average sized bar which demitre the hotels Casanova worked. Unless u was a female aged between 16 -18 he wouldn't give u the time of day. Wen we tried to get a drink we was told the all inclusive bar was at the other side of the pool which was a little window.we cud only have lager or watered down vodka or brandy in tiny plastic cups. The man serving wud make u wait till he had a cig or was on the phone.if there was a que he wud get snappy with people and then go even slower. I actually once went up wen there was no que and as I reached the hole in the wall he rang someone and I was stood there ten mins before I got fed up and walked off.(I believe he did this so in the end people wud just give up goin for drinks) u was not able to complain as u would get kicked out. In the space of 2 days we saw 3 people get kicked out for the littlest things. The staff were all rude and rather intimidating. We felt we had to shut up and put or get out. I would not recommend this hotel to my worst enemy and wud advise anyone thinking of staying there to book somewhere else!!!!!! If u want all inclusive good luck with that!!!!

Room Tip: There is none at this hotel go somewhere else!!!
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  • Stayed July 2013, traveled as a couple
    • Value
    • Location
    • Sleep Quality
    • Rooms
    • Cleanliness
    • Service
Helpful?
8 Thank Lynn M
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
Manchester, United Kingdom
Level Contributor
11 reviews
6 hotel reviews
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 20 helpful votes
Reviewed July 17, 2013

We're to start, hotel disgusting, food crap, staff ignorant, cleaners don't clean , had property stolen from my room, when i approached the manager regarding some of my clothing had been stolen, and I complained about the state of the room, lampshades hanging of mould in the shower, I was ask to leave, and to my amazement TWENTY PEOPLE , also , the just seem to take ur money then wanna throw u out, it's not worth a penny to stay there, it was horrendous , luckily I managed to not let them spoil my holiday, was glad to leave , and found a wonderful friendly hotel at the bottom of road, called the PRIMAVERA HOTEL, thanks to rula and Niko, wonderful couple I enjoyed my holiday, on getting to the airport today, I bumped into a good handful of people which we had met at the hotel , half of which were also told to leave by the arogant manager, holidays from hell should go there, they would have a field day, please avoid at all cost.

Stayed July 2013, traveled as a couple
Helpful?
6 Thank thehwrds
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
London, United Kingdom
1 review
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 7 helpful votes
Reviewed July 17, 2013

I spent a week witn my partmer in Telemachos hotel in Dassia. I have ever witnessed the most chaotic and unsympathetic management and Staff in my entire life.

The diner was that a diner....where you waited for more than 20 mins. to be served with the expectation that if you wanted more you would have to queue for another 20-30 mins.
Any kind of alcoholic or soft weren't to be found. We found later in the week that was a bar ever manned where you could have some sort of soft drink served by a very grumpy member of staff who seemed to hate giving you any drinks considering everything was previously paid since we were on an all inclusive deal.

The room was not cleaned and inhabited by a swarm of mosquitoes who attacked me with vile enthusiasm.
No hot water in the first room we were allocated and it took three visits to reception before our room was changed.

Overall a very disappointing experience and please take my advice and never ever stay in Telemachos HOtel.

  • Stayed July 2013, traveled as a couple
    • Value
    • Location
    • Sleep Quality
    • Rooms
    • Cleanliness
    • Service
Helpful?
7 Thank LeviBenzaken
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
Edinburgh, United Kingdom
Level Contributor
3 reviews
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 5 helpful votes
Reviewed July 17, 2013

The hotel, the food and the staff all were below standard. As all inclusive we were denied drinks if one of us had just asked for one. the manager and his wife ( the German lady) were amongst the worst staff you ever meet. the German lady ordered the WiFi to be stopped as she wanted to make profit by making guests using the pay as you go internet which was super slow.
the hotel rooms on the old building were filthy, we had to pay 90 EUR to get a better room. The cleaning was far beyond bad, the floor was so dirty me and my 2 kids and husband had to wear shoe at all time. Even if you mentioned this to the staff and they would promise you to send a cleaner to clean the room they couldn't care less.
I forgot the ripped sheets which were changed once every 7-8 days, towels were changed every 4-5 days, disgusting...
The rats, you should be careful if you have kids as the rats are in the hotel and on all the trees at the hotel, specially in the evening and night if you sit by the pool, you will never miss them.
The staff did not care about the guests or their requests what so ever, they never give you any information about the facilities you may have the right to have, for example the safe is free for All inclusive, but we were not informed and the cleaners may steal your money as they did with us, they did not take much but still it is disgusting, our Norwegian neighbours had their money stolen as well.
the Food was the same day in day out: chips, rice, pasta and some meat in that order, i have to mention the queue like if you are in prison.
The barman Dimitry who was there only for young girls bed, made me puke, disgusting.
PLEASE CANCEL YOUR BOOKING AT THIS HOTEL. EVEN £1.00 PER NIGHT IS A WAST OF MONEY IN THIS PLACE.

Room Tip: Rooms on the new building are not too bad but not worth paying extra.
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  • Stayed November 2012, traveled with family
    • Value
    • Location
    • Sleep Quality
    • Rooms
    • Cleanliness
    • Service
Helpful?
5 Thank T E
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
Halifax, United Kingdom
1 review
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 4 helpful votes
Reviewed July 16, 2013

We only went for a short break (3days) and I really feel bad for the folk who were there for a week or a two week break. Ive been to a lot of Hotels but never one like this. The room was basic which I expected , but the up keep of it was very poor.
There was big patches of plaster missing of the walls, one of the electric sockets was hanging out of the wall and the only way it would work was to jiggle it.
The bathroom was very grotty, only a stand up shower , and it was hanging on the wall with wire and nails. When you have a shower the shower head was loose and spraying water all over the lights etc.
When you arrive they put you in a block with no air con so if you want a better room you have to pay to move. The all inclusive is a right farse and its a waste of time / money (yours).
In the restaurant there is only one que, with him serving everyone one at a time.
Even if you just want salad you have to join the que. The breakfast was just adequet, Lunch theres pasta and one choice of meat, same as evening. Oh there is two choices , TAKE IT or LEAVE IT.
ALLINCLUSIVE times are 10.30am to 9.30pm
The all inclusive Drinks are served from a small window at the other side of the pool, your served your drinks out of vending machine cups. Drinks range are pop, beer, vodka brandy and ouso. the measures are so small you cant taste it.
Yet again theres a que for drinks for which the guy behind the bar is so slow your faster queing up at Alton Towers. Once its finished you change bars where you then pay for your warm beer.
All in all I feel sorry for the families who are there for longer periods, we just used it for a base.
STAY AWAY YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

Room Tip: My Tip is go somewhere else
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  • Stayed July 2013, traveled as a couple
    • Location
Helpful?
4 Thank halfprice98
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
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Additional Information about Telemachos Hotel

Property: Telemachos Hotel
Address: Dassia 490 83, Greece
Location: Greece > Ionian Islands > Corfu > Dassia
Amenities:
Restaurant Swimming Pool
Hotel Style:
Ranked #13 of 15 Hotels in Dassia
Price Range (Based on Average Rates): $
Hotel Class:3 star — Telemachos Hotel 3*
Number of rooms: 100
Reservation Options:
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Also Known As:
Telemachos Hotel Corfu/Dassia
Tilemachos Hotel Corfu

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