We drove for an hour to get to Ermes Locanda and were very excited to try this highly reviewed, no menu restaurant.
The owner Mario came up to us, (as he does every table as he is the only waiter), and told us there was no menu- the only choice we could have is how we wanted our main fish cooked. Whether grilled or fried. There would be an antipasto, a pasta and the main. We told Mario it was up to him and off he went. We asked him to suggest a red wine- which he happily brought over to the table...the wine was fine- except after looking at the bottle it was a 2018 vintage....a bizarre choice but the wine was drinkable so we were ok with it.
As we waited for the antipasto to arrive, we watched in amazement at both the portion size and assortment of fish on the plates- we couldn't wait to dig into ours.
Except the antipasto never arrived. Instead, we were served and order of pasta which Mario described as Sicilian pasta...It was well cooked and pretty tasty.
The couple next to us (who came in about 20 minutes after us), got their antipasto- and it looked seriously amazing. When I asked Mario about it, he replied, you have the "short menu". When I said we didn't want the short menu, he decided his English wasn't good enough and he walked away from us. I went over to him and said in fluent Italian, "where is our antipasto"? and basically he said again, "you get the short menu".
It was then we realized that something bizarre was going on and instead of waiting for our main course.....we asked for a check. Of course on the check were the normal charges for service, bread and water plus the pasta we ate. We paid the bill and left.
On the hour drive back to our hotel, we still didn't know what happened...it was as truly bizarre an experience as we've ever had in a restaurant.,
To add to this review, I received a Facebook message from Mario saying he was sorry that we were unhappy, but he thought we would prefer the "short menu". His messages were in Italian so I replied using Google Translate how disappointed we were to be shortchanged at dinner by not giving us the entire menu.
All I can say is, if you come here, beware the moods of Mario....maybe you'll be lucky enough to get that antipasto...or maybe he'll not be in the mood and give you the "short menu".
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