Mr Lash and I were attracted to this hotel due to it's Child Unfriendly policy. The wee blighters have to pay their way. No free juice for Andy and Jenny here. It tends to put children off travelling, when they are expected to pay for their room.
There were indeed no children in the pool, just some very fat ladies - which totes cheered me up. I do enjoy being the thinnest one there! And a big Russian man who's burd kept telling him off for smiling at me.
Karim, who runs the restaurant and bar and maybe the whole joint, is possibly the nicest Moroccan man on the planet. And a lot of them are quite friendly. Karim made us the perfect martinis, after only one lesson from Mr Lash! Always cheerful, but never aggressively so, he knocked himself out coming up with a spicy breakfast for Mr Lash who chows like a Chinese man even when he's in Africa.
Most of the staff were lovely, but there was this dude who introduced himself as the Manager and kept saying, 'We have exceeded your expectations'. This first came up when we were offered a complimentary trip to the spa, then given a bill for Mr Lash's treatment.
Mr Lash pointed out how odd it would be if only one guest were given a Welcome Drink, while the other half of the couple paid for his. The fee for Mr Lash's massage was waived, but we were warned - not for the first time - that they had 'Exceeded our Expectations'.
Driving to the medina was the next time our expectations were exceeded. The hotel's driver said he'd normally dump us 'over there' - Over There being the side of the motorway - but he would Exceed our Expectations by actually driving us to the Medina! Mr Lash explained that this was our expectation.
The Housekeeper was yacking to the maid while she was cleaning my bathroom while I tried to read on my private terrace. I had to play David Cassidy rather loud to persuade her to leave! Always travel with some bad music on your ipod is my advice.
We did enjoy our stay at the Mosaic Palais, but the only thing that really exceeded expectation was that Karim managed to make the perfect martini after only one lesson. Bartenders around the world are not as gracious in accepting Mr Lash's advice, and stubbornly insist on putting in too much Vermouth.
- Official Description (provided by the hotel):
- Conveniently close to the beating heart of the imperial city, Mosaic Palais Aziza & Spa, discreetly nestled away in the heart of a green oasis located in the most exclusive recess of Marrakech's palm Grove "La Palmeraie," it is an elegant and serene haven of luxury and simplicity. This five star deluxe boutique hotel offers richly appointed guest rooms, suites, pavilions and garden villas tucked away in 5 acres of lush gardens planted with fruit and palm trees and lined with flower beds tastefully laid out around patios and pools. Harmoniously blending traditional Moroccan architecture with state of the art amenities, attentive service and outstanding facilities created to seduce the discerning traveler. ... more less
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