I stayed here with my parents when I was a kid and while it's nice to know that some things never change, this place is long overdue for an overhaul.
The villa apartments feature tube televisions, towels and manchester made when Paul Keating was PM, and furniture so tired it's asleep.
Likewise, the hotel's restaurant is adorned with photos of 90s Aussie luminaries like George Gregan, Kate Fischer and Rob Sitch with a menu these very people were probably enjoying 15 years ago.
The staff are friendly but a bit useless and it seemed like the whole place was on a skeleton shift the entire weekend we were there. A late check-out was a problem, the wine served with dinner was stale and a request to get a desert sent to the room was met with a 100-yard stare.
People come here for the Golden Door Spa or the Golf, which is great, and we didn't really mind the time travel aspect, but a couple of small gestures could go a long way to improving the Cypress Lakes experience.
Like decent TVs hooked up to a system that shows the cricket in the correct aspect ratio, whack a Nespresso machine and an ipod dock in every villa, and please put someone behind the counter at the pool to hand out towels made this decade.
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