For those of you who read my blog, OurManOnIsla.info, you’ll probably remember where I spent 4th of July this year. Right here at Bahia Tortuga with my good amigo, Sid Morris. After eating a couple of enchiladas at the bar, and jello shots started appearing from nowhere, well, that’s all I can recall about that celebration.
Wait, there was a live guitarist in the Performing Arts Center stage
There was a bartender pouring liquor down anyone’s awaiting mouth…like a momma bird…and THEN, that’s all I remember.
But, I digress, let’s get back to rewarding you for being curious about the title of this review.
Yes, my Spanish speaking aficionados, I KNOW what Bahia Tortuga literally means; and here’s WHY I define it differently.
My blog post (OurManOnIsla.info) describing our jaunt to Caye Caulker, more accurately, the return I will succinctly describe it here.
Two Water taxis, Three cabs, and One 10 hour bus ride. Overnight.
Not knowing if we would make it on the bus in Belize City, we didn’t make a reservation to stay a few days at the Bahia Tortuga – we had to gamble there would be a room available.
When we finally arrived back on Isla, the sun was just rising and we caught the first ferry ride across. Hungry. Beat down tired and getting cranky.
We showed up at Bahia Tortuga and it was dead still. As it should be at this ungodly time of the morning.
We pulled up two lounge chairs. Jilly was out like a light, while I needed to see IF there was even a room available to reserve. Jumped online, found their site and instantly made a reservation…then just closed my eyes.
I don’t know how long we were in those positions, but were awaken by a staffer who asked if we had been downstairs, which we had not. We were just trying to be invisible as the pool area where we were sitting is the centerpiece of the 4 guest rooms.
Moments later Bahia’s owner, Danny, came down and I started to explain what I was doing sleeping on his property at Rooster thirty…I did my best to be coherent and explain, to which he simply invited us into his home upstairs! Even though he had only seen me around town a few times and at his 4th of July celebration, it didn’t seem to matter. He set Jilly up on his couch extended the privileges of the property to us, and, without continuing on about his treatment towards us, THAT’S why it means “Generosity”.
About the actual property, if you closed your eyes, then opened them, you would have no idea where you were. ‘Cept maybe some millionaires compound. It’s like a man cave on steroids. A Saturday night man party? Throw up a stripper pole surrounded by a few poker tables in the Performing Arts Center and Presto!
OCD clean. Tastefully decorated and inviting. A high-class dock that just begs for company with it’s offer of serenity. It’s the kind of dock that a guy proposes at sunset to his girl. Or a couple of guys with a couple of beers and cigars say, and now truthfully, “It doesn’t get any better than this boys.”
Food choices are simple which is what you want when “beaching it” My choice? The cheeseburger. Freshly ground sirloin with NO fillers. Like a hamburger should be. Add hand-cut french fries made to order; what’s not to like?
Price point is high-value. If you wanted to step off property and explore the city, you surely can, however, if you choose not to, you wouldn’t be lacking a thing.
Location is convenient and central to everything. Don’t have a moto or golf cart for your stay? Step onto the curb, and you’ll soon hear a sharp, short “tweet!”
Raise your hand, say “Trenta pesos to…?” TO get anywhere in town (Centro) should never cost you more than that. Punta Sur may cost near double as it IS on the other side of the island.
You work hard all day, all week and all year.
For what it’s worth, don’t cheat yourself. You can read between the lines on that one folks.
Post script. Owner Rhonda suggested we trek to the top deck as the views are ridiculous, so, who are we to argue with ones' definition of "ridiculous"?
We did. And it. Is. Ree Dick You Lous. Take your camera. Why this space isn't being made available for special occasions...hint, hint.
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