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“Watch out for the arrogance”

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Club Med Turkoise, Turks & Caicos
Ranked #27 of 45 Hotels in Providenciales
canada
2 reviews
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 16 helpful votes
“Watch out for the arrogance”
Reviewed May 5, 2005

I was at club med the last week in April 2005. This is my 2nd time to Turks, I was there the same time last year. The food and drinks is pretty good for having to feed 600 people--they say 450 guests and upto 130 GO's (I will talk about THEM later). The buffet style food will get a little boring after a while, but it actually has been the best selection and quality that I have seen at an all inclusive. The bar always pours good drinks, if you want stronger of weaker drinks you just ask, the GO's that work behind the bar don't care how much they serve....all that talk about watered down drinks is garbage.
The resort is starting to show its age, they are constantly renovating the place but it is mostly little touch ups here and there and sometimes it actually looks worse (I guess the hurricane did a bit of damage a little while ago and instead of fixing the roof they threw some shingles here and there, looks like garbage for now)
The ocean and sand is as you see in the pictures...amazing..enough said there.
I stayed in a renovated room, no big deal from the unrenovated. The renovated had a door in the shower room and that pretty much is it, the downsize is the bed they put in there are so small, it was like sleeping in a kids bed, the unrenovated rooms have bigger beds and only curtains for the showers, I would have stayed in either.

The only downfall to the resort was the attitude from the GO's and some of the guests. Last year everyone was happy go lucky, this year yikes! The GO's are only out to score...in the daytime when they are supposed be working they are all freindly, but at night look out, I was the competition and there was no questions about that. I have never seen such presistance to score with new gals on the block, I actually had on GO come up to a girl I was talking to and threaten her with a 24hr timelimit to sleep with him because he "felt this amazing connection with her", and I think the 7th time she said no, he tried someone new. Its bad to say but most of the GO's really are scum and you just got to let them know off the bat who the guest is and who works there for the guest. Some of the guests were pretty conceited, but that is normal everywhere.
Great place but if you leave the resort things get really expensive, seadoos are $140 hr, outragous since Cancun was only $50 hr during the high season.

  • Stayed April 2005
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Helpful?
14 Thank travelguy2008Canada
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
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English first
Charlotte, NC
2 reviews
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 15 helpful votes
Reviewed May 2, 2005

This was my first Club Med and my first all-inclusive resort (and my travel buddy's second trip in 5 years and a guy friend's first trip (separate room)). Before going, I did not expect a first class hotel - accomodations and/or food. After reading the postings on Trip Advisor I also expected to be treated rudely. My overall view was- I had a great time and the only thing I didn't like was the number of French Canadians and New Yorkers. Nothing personal, but I enjoy meeting people from around the world and I thought about 80% of the guests were from these two regions.
The food I enjoyed. There is something for everyone. I enjoyed the fresh seafood salads and breads the most; for even for the most finicky eater they had pasta available every night. Each night is a different theme- my least favorite was TexMex- but i'm not much into Tex Mex anyway. But they had oysters to escargo to make your own stirfry and it was all good. I should know- i'm about 5 lbs heavier now.
I did not encounter one rude person and actually was taken aback by how the GO's went out of there way to say hello- even walking down the sidewalk. The islanders, who were mostly wait staff and housekeepers, were less friendly, but never rude, but I also greeted everyone with a nice hello (why not- i'm on vacation!).
I was very surprised at how hard the GO's work. You begin the day by eating with them and you will see them throughout the day up until they perform in the shows at night and then they are always out on the dancefloor trying to get everyone enthused and involved way past midnight. The GO's get one day a week off. Turks has a new Chief of the Village (2 weeks at that time) and I saw him often at various places in the resort checking in with guests and greeting them. I heard that he was focusing on many of the negatives that i've read in the trip advisor reviews, especially the food.
I also might add that i'm a single 31 year old, not bad looking woman, and I never felt as if any of the GO's were trying to put the moves on me. Yes they were friendly, but never out of line. Of course I have a sense of humor about these things as well.
I did have a renovated room and it was always very clean. We were greeted with a tiny gecko in the room one day- just add that to the island flair. One night we ran out of hot water- but it was the same temp. as the pool so I got used to it.
The drinks were great- they didn't skimp on alcohol at all. The bartenders work their butts off- we were sort of dissapointed that you couldn't tip them. Not that I wanted to spend any money, but they were always friendly even at the busiest time. I also ordered alot of my own home made drinks and they were quick to accomodate. Also the island water wasn't very good and Club Med does not supply bottled water except when you check-in, so expect to pay $2 for a large bottle at the boutique.
We did the sunset sail excursion which was extra- the rum punch was very weak. Overall it was fine. We also did the conch/snorkel trip and really enjoyed that. The fresh conch salad was awesome- made right in front of you.
I also liked the fact that there wasn't anyone bugging you on the beach (except the parasailing guy). Most islands i've been to you get hit on all the time by locals trying to sell you something.
I only saw 3 shows and they were all good- the trapeze show (1st half the guests perform, 2nd half the GO's perform). The circus show was great- I had no idea the GO's were that talented. My guess is they were well skilled gymnasts at one point. I heard their Circus show is the best of all Club Med's. Don't go expecting Vegas or Broadway, but the shows are cute, funny, and worth watching.
The beach was perfect. The snorkeling was was dissapointing- not the staff or boat, but the actual reefs were worn and I saw little fish life. I think you would get better snorkeling if you paid for a trip that took you out farther than the immediate area. We did see one dolphin- it may have been the famous JoJo.
By the end of the week I did get a little tired of introducing myself to everyone I ate with but if I had gone by myself I would have welcomed it.
There is plenty to do if you take advantage of it. I would not go would go to this resort as a couple, but having no kids around would in itself make me go back again. I was quite surprised that I did not see any true drunks the entire week or anyone out of line. Perhaps we had a boring crowd, but I actually expected it to get a little crazy and it never did. My only other complaint was on Thursday they brought over 100 Canadian travel agents in to promote the resort. They were often in conference, but at night the smoke was almost unbearable in the bar area. I hadn't noticed any smoke before they came.
So all in all I say if you want to be pampered all week and expect only the finest of things - don't go here! If you want to have fun, go with the flow and relax (which is why you came in the first place), you WILL enjoy yourself.

  • Stayed April 2005
    • Value
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Helpful?
14 Thank tflag
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
A TripAdvisor Member
Reviewed May 2, 2005

great time, excellent weather, good selection food, beers included corona, turks, and bud, while the fruity tropical drinks were completely dependent on the person who made them.

windsurfing, sailing, tennis, snorkeling, trapeze all included with lessons!

bar open until 4am

beach was beautiful

staff was very pleasant and friendly

accomidations were decent (remodeled rooms were more impressive however "older" rooms had larger beds)

quick airport traveling ~15min

nice breeze most days - sun was very strong - definetly bring sun screen

internet portals available, cell phones run on roaming, never used the hotel phone, no bugs in the room, fresh towels daily

will go back in the future.

  • Stayed April 2005
    • Value
    • Rooms
    • Cleanliness
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Helpful?
13 Thank A TripAdvisor Member
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
A TripAdvisor Member
Reviewed April 24, 2005

My boyfriend and I stayed at Club Med Turkoise the last week of March. I stay at all-inclusive resorts at least two times a year and have stayed at all the major chains as of now. This trip to Turks and Caicos was my first time staying at a club med. Upon arriving at the airport we were forced to wait a half hour in the sun, baking waiting for the next flight to arrive so they could cram us all in a van (and save a trip back).
We were greeted warmly at the resort with drinks and given our room keys and a brief tour. As soon as we entered the room we realized that we may have made a mistake staying here. W had a renovated oceanview (as booked), but the room, as well as the entire second floor of that building was absolutely infested with fleas (as we found out from all our neighbors). After speaking to the desk and being told there we no rooms available to switch to I requested to speak to the Chef de Village. I was told there was no management on staff at that time and would have to wait until the evening. We grabbed our suitcases and brought them outside the room. I called the desk again a half hour later and then a GO came to check on the proble. Upon seeing the fleas we were moved to another room, not oceanview, but flea-less.
The rest of the vacation was pretty good. We made the best of what was available, snorkeled, took sailing lessons. The beach was beautiful- raked ever nioght- and the water the nicest i have ever seen.
I do have to say though that the resort is staffed by extremely obnoxious people. If you ask a question, some will pretend not to hear you at all - like the grill cooks at sharkies. Other poeple will give you a nasty answer and roll their eyes (the towel lady).
The food was for the most part edible, but nowhere near as good as i have had at any of the Beaches, Sandals or even Occidental resorts i have stayed at... spend the extra money and go to Beaches T&C!
However, drinks were strong and delicious.
The people staying there were either from NY or French speaking. Not understanding a word during dinner became tiring after day two so we would make out plates and then eat near the pool.
One last thing is that if you are going as a couple, this is not a place for you. (request a king bed otherwise you will end up with two twin beds that they push together and call a king) This is a singles "last resort" where people looking to get drunk and laid frequent apparently. It was like going to a frat party every night (which got irritating and disgusting at times). If thats your thing, then enjoy... i'll spend a bit more next time and have an enjoyable vacation!

  • Stayed March 2005
    • Value
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Helpful?
16 Thank A TripAdvisor Member
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
North York Ontario
Level Contributor
2 reviews
common_n_hotel_reviews_1bd8 31 helpful votes
Reviewed April 23, 2005

I have to tell you folks- I travel allot- and have been to many Club Meds over the last 15 years. when the concept was new- they did'nt even provide locks for the doors- which was ok- because Club Med is ADULT CAMP! Thats right it's camp for Adults! So I knew what to expect when going to Club Med- sparse rooms- dimly lit- and the idea is you are not going to spend to much time in your room.

Some people go with the idea that they are going to hook up! Meet girls! Forget it guys- The Go's are like chick magnets(thats what they think)- and will be constantly hitting on any and every single girl they can find- not only that but the Go's(organizers, staff) eat every meal with you- and are constantly looking to score with single woman. Truth many woman go to Adult Club Meds to meet these GO's . I travelled with my girlfriend- but I would not recommend a Club Med if you are going with the purpose of hopefully getting Laid. It's all B.S. and someone should stop that mith.

Anyways, why is this the Worst Adult Club Med- many reasons- the staff are Horrid- I have never encountered in all my travelling years a group of people so self absorbed with themselves. The staff are not there for you! The staff are there for themselves. They are pre-occupied with there own little life dramas that go with being a G.O. They were rude beyond belief- and they are the most phony group of G.O.'s I have honestly encountered.

The Chief of the Village is a womanizer- he is constantly loaded on booze - and will insult you if given the chance.

The food was dreadful- the head of the village explained to me and my girlfriend that the food was poor- because Clubmed(the corporation) was operating with a much smaller budget than in previous years. Plus they had to allocate funds to the 'cheap renevation that was going on with part of the resort'..

I could go on and on- and trust me I am not a bitter person- And I am very openminded. I am just telling you like it really is! The resort is horrid.

  • Stayed January 2005
    • Value
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    • Cleanliness
    • Service
Helpful?
23 Thank Encorefun
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
A TripAdvisor Member
Reviewed March 29, 2005

We stayed at Club Med Turkoise the third week of February, also known as "ski week." There were a lot of educators staying there, as there are no children at the club. We had a beautiful, clean room, with a shower door, in contrast to one of the other authors. We were, however, in a renovated room, on the scuba side of the club. The non-renovated rooms were shabby in comparison, and with time I expect that they all will be renovated. (Note that this club was hit by hurricanes in fall '04, so there may be some delays.) Our food was very good, better than cruise ship food, but not up to good restaurants in NYC. There was lots of fruit at each meal, and the bread was terrific as always. You do eat with strangers, like all Club Meds, and you either like this or you don't. There was no attempt to seat you by native language, which I've seen at some Clubs. The Chef de Village was present, visible, and friendly during our stay. We used the scuba facilities: good equipment, good boat and satisfactory instruction; sailing equipment: good; pools: beautiful but unheated; gym: fair equipment; and ping-pong. My sole disappointment: There was no petanque tournament. (This club also offers trapeze and trampoline, but we didn't use these.) The ocean is spectacular, and the beach is wonderful; it doesn't get much better. The GO's were courteous, and English was the primary spoken language at the club. Club Med raised its prices about $800 compared to last year, so it did seem more expensive. This is really a place to relax and enjoy the beach; I'd return in a heartbeat.

  • Stayed February 2005
    • Value
    • Rooms
    • Cleanliness
    • Service
Helpful?
16 Thank A TripAdvisor Member
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
A TripAdvisor Member
Reviewed March 26, 2005

I spent many months researching and reading reviews about different tropical locations and I am extremely happy that I chose Club Med.

The GO's were superb...........two thumbs up and a world of thanks to,
Mason, Emilio, Peter, Caroline, Dinilio, everyone at the trapeze station and everyone that I am forgetting to mention. You guys were wonderful. Thanks for making our vacation so very memorable.

Listen folks, if you want a vacation full of activities, great beaches, great staff, good food and variety, excellent renovated rooms then I would certainly advise you to pick Club med. Forget the negative reviews.Get down there meet people from all over the world and GET INVOLVED in all the activities. Ultimately, it's what you make of it. Put your inhibitions aside and just let loose. I guarantee you won't be disappointed.

We met friends for life and we will be making this an annual affair. Beware....CLUB MED ! We are coming back stronger then ever!

To all our friends for life :
Franky ( Brooklyn ) ,Captain Lou,Ted Bundy, Oompaloompas.........Jake and Frank ( New York ),Francis ( Brooklyn ),Janice, Maria, Marysusan,Melissa,Lyndsay,Yonna, Julia..........................

See you folks next year and THANKS TO ALL THE CLUB MED STAFF !

Pat and Frank ( Toronto ).

  • Stayed March 2005
    • Value
    • Rooms
    • Cleanliness
    • Service
Helpful?
8 Thank A TripAdvisor Member
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.
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Additional Information about Club Med Turkoise, Turks & Caicos

Property: Club Med Turkoise, Turks & Caicos
Address: TKCA 1ZZ, Providenciales
Phone Number:
Location: Caribbean > Turks and Caicos > Providenciales
Amenities:
Bar / Lounge Beach Fitness Center with Gym / Workout Room Free Breakfast Free Parking Restaurant Spa Swimming Pool Airport Transportation
Hotel Style:
#14 Top resorts Hotel in Providenciales
#20 Spa Hotel in Providenciales
#24 On the Beach Hotel in Providenciales
Price Range (Based on Average Rates): $$$
Number of rooms: 291
Official Description (provided by the hotel):
An adult-only all inclusive resort in Turks & Caicos with gorgeous award-winning beaches and thrilling watersports. Travel to Club Med Turkoise with your friends or alone to enjoy an all-inclusive vacation in beachfront tropical scenery on the island of Providenciales, in the Caribbean Sea. Stay at this upscale all-inclusive adult resort and experience a vacation as carefree as exciting. Relax on a beach chair or indulge in the ultimate in water sports and fun activities. As one of the best all-inclusive resorts reserved exclusively for adults, this beautiful location is a destination that allows singles and couples to enjoy their getaway like they never have before. ... more   less 
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Also Known As:
Club Med Turkoise, Turks And Caicos
Club Med Turkoise, Turks & Caicos Hotel Providenciales
Club Med Turks Caicos
Club Med Providenciales
Turks Caicos Club Med
Turkoise
Providenciales Club Med
Club Med Turkoise, Turks & Caicos Turks And Caicos/Providenciales

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