This is a very detailed and lengthy review of KALANI. I reiterate a few key points that you should definitely know before you go to this retreat/resort.


First let me start by saying if you’re looking for luxury accommodations KALANI is NOT for you. But if you’re looking for a relaxing retreat FAR REMOVED from the city life and where you can become one with nature, this is the place for you. KALANI is an eco-friendly retreat-style resort where quite a few of the “employees” are a part of the Volunteer program. Basically they work as a part of the staff for board and food. The were ALL SUPER friendly and accommodating which pleased me a lot.


I chose KALANI for a couple of reasons. 1. This was an early birthday present and starting point for me and my partner’s Hawaiian vacation 2. It’s a gay/gay friendly resort. 3. it’s secluded and away from the hustle and bustle of everything. 4. From the description on the website it would provide everything I was looking for. 5. They are eco-friendly 6.It was approx. 1 mile from the Black Sand Beach – Kehena.


I’ll start off with the trip from the airport. We started our journey to KALANI approx. 9 pm and the resort is difficult to find. The goggle directions and their website gave an estimated travel time of 45 mins – 1 hour. Unfortunately, since we arrived in the evening and the roads are so dark, it took us about 2 ½ hours to find it. I HIGHLY recommended renting a vehicle that has a GPS/Navigation System OR arrive during the daylight hours so that there’s still some light out to find your way. Without it, you will definitely have trouble if you’re not familiar. Luckily one of the locals was there to help and he gave us turn by turn directions. Also, looking for the sign is quite difficult since it’s set back from the road. I’ve provided the GPS coordinates, street address the navigation system recognizes and a picture of the KALANI sign you need to look for.

We finally located KALANI and pulled up to the main gate. There’s a code you need to enter on the keypad for entry onto the property. We didn’t have any problems but I suggest you confirm the passcode with the office prior to your arrival to ensure it hasn’t changed. While pulling up @ the gate, we were met by one of the newer volunteers who directed us towards the main office (they had a dance letting out which why there were so many people around). Prior to our arrival, I let the staff know that we would arrive after the office closed. They assured me our keys would be in an envelope tacked to the main office door which they were. Along with the keys was the confirmation for our stay, a map of the resort and the next day’s planned activities.

*****NOTE***** There are really NO LIGHTS on at the resort and they rely on natural sunlight/daylight (eco friendly remember?) so DEFINITELY bring a flashlight with you for evening/after hours activities, one for each person is best. They sell flashlights @ the resort’s store for $6 each; we found a double pack of the same flashlight for $6.97 @ Walmart. Of course you would expect to pay higher prices @ the resort so I wasn’t surprised.

We had a little trouble navigating the way to our “cottage” due to the darkness and lack of paved road. *****NOTE***** an off road vehicle is also HIGHLY suggested. When I say this is a very natural resort, I mean it in the truest form; there were NO paved roads. I wish we would’ve rented an SUV but our car sufficed.

When we arrived @ our “cottage” we were unsure which one it was. Again, NO LIGHTS but thankfully one of the staff members turned on a light, came downstairs and helped us find it. I felt bad because after 10 pm its “quiet time” and my partner and I are naturally noisy but he just smiled and helped us to our room.

Once inside, the “cottage” was exactly what I expected. Don’t be alarmed by my description and I’ve provided pictures. It basically resembles a wooden house with 4 sections. Upon entering you will see a sign that requests you to remove your shoes before walking in; PLEASE RESPECT THEIR REQUEST AND TRADITIONS! We stayed in OV14; the room is small and quaint with the barest of necessities. When walking into the room, immediately in front of you is the bed which is pushed up against the wall that has “windows” that reach from the ceiling to the middle of the wall (when laying down you can sit up and look out the window). The windows aren’t real “windows”; it’s basically carved out in the shape of a window and completely screened in for that outdoorsy feeling without actually “camping out” and it also kept the bugs out (thankfully!). The room is furnished with a queen size bed and small sink w/ a mirror above it, 2 lamps, a standing shower separated from the room by a shower curtain and a “separate room” (I say room cause it has a door that closes) for the toilet area which also had shelves and an additional blanket if needed. NO TV, NO RADIO AND NO PHONE (not even cell phone reception). There is also a door to the far right which leads you to a shared patio. Once we finally settled into bed, you could hear and smell the ocean and also the “natural” sounds of nature all around. Even better the “screened in windows” provide you with a spectacular view of the night sky which was lit up with stars that shined so bright! Not to sound cliché; this had to be one of the most peaceful sleeps I’ve EVER had.

The most joyful part of my stay was waking up to a view of the ocean and the sky right outside my “window” and the resort is so quiet you could hear the waves crashing. The sun rose on the other side of the building so I was lucky to have the daylight view without the sun obstructing my vision; complete and utter peace. Also, the cottage is decorated outside with unique drawings, colors and woodwork; very visually appealing.

KALANI specializes in health, wellness and well being and feature Yoga and mediation classes, Hawaiian and World Culture classes as well body work so I opted for us to have the 1 hr., 15 min. “lomi-lomi” massages after a full day of hiking and walking. The massage area is located near the pool in a “Japanese” style house up a short flight of stairs. When we first walked in we were greeted by name by our masseurs and walked into our private rooms which were dimly lit, screened in and the massage table sitting in the middle of the floor. My masseur spoke to me about her technique and asked if I had any medical issues or pain that I needed worked on. After our brief discussion she excused herself so I could get undressed and comfortable on the table, then came back in and gave me the BEST massage with a wonderful citrus smelling rub (don’t know if it was lotion or oil or what and she said it was hypo allergenic since I have sensitive skin). My partner enjoyed her massage so much she fell asleep and they let her rest for a ½ hour AFTER her massage was finished. Just a true feeling of warmth and accommodation; I made sure to tip them both well. They did an excellent job!

Lastly we ended our last night with a skinny dip in the pool. *****NOTE***** - the pool is top optional and after 7 pm clothing optional and we took full advantage of it. It was wonderful.

I can only think of 2 complaints 1. The lighting – while I know this is an eco-friendly resort (one of the top reasons I chose this place) I do feel when guests are arriving late (like we did) there should be some type of lighting provided or maybe someone to escort guests to their rooms upon arrival. (I don’t really have a solution so maybe I shouldn’t complain, huh?) 2. Dinner – the only meal we had at the resort was dinner before our massages. While I didn’t enjoy the couscous (too hard), asparagus (too mushy) or the mushrooms that topped the salmon; I LOVED the salad bar, fresh OJ and brownies (definitely made with care)!! I also loved the seating arrangement in that they HAD NO ARRANGEMENT! You just grab an open chair, plop down your plate and strike up a conversation with your neighbor!

All in all, I would definitely recommend KALANI to another couple or individuals that are gay/gay-friendly/non-judgmental. This is a retreat/resort that is all about openness, peace, serenity and just enjoying life in its simplest and purest form! If given the chance I would definitely go back and participate in some of the other group activities offered on sight! Wonderful staff, wonderful guests, totally relaxing and EXACTLY what the doctor ordered for us both!