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“Dives Pullum ("El Pollo Rico")” 4 of 5 stars
Review of El Pollo Rico

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El Pollo Rico
13470 Minnieville Rd, Woodbridge, VA
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Ranked #98 of 237 Restaurants in Woodbridge
Cuisines: Peruvian
Restaurant details
Arlington, Virginia
Senior Contributor
25 reviews 25 reviews
25 restaurant reviews
Reviews in 16 cities Reviews in 16 cities
16 helpful votes 16 helpful votes
“Dives Pullum ("El Pollo Rico")”
4 of 5 stars Reviewed May 30, 2013

I was coming back from NC from a business trip. The day was beautiful, but the traffic in I-95 sucked. I was tired and hungry, but with very little time and patience for food. Forced by my savage stomach juices, I was "compulsed" to exit in Woodbridge, VA hunting for something to wolf, and I found "El Pollo Rico" (Dives Pullum (Latin), or The tasty Chicken in raw English). I am glad I stopped there.

To understand this chicken, I must give you some background. The Inca God "Konira Wirakocha" was a wanderer god who meandered dressed as an impoverished traveler spying in all the restaurants of the Inca Empire to discover who stole his divine "Peruvian Chicken Recipe". He didn't know that the Pullum Traffickers have already smuggled the recipe into the U.S. The lack of Peruvian Chicken then, finally caused the catastrophic fall of all Inca gods. It's a fact! An Ekeko told me so.

Anyway, the place was small (but chickens do not need much room, right?) and it looked like the place where "Speedy Gonzalez" would eat for the velocity of the service. The prices were budget-able. I did not seat in, but I devoured the odoriferous grilled chicken cadaver in my car. It was delicious! I licked my fingers (twice each one).

The chicken corpse was so dapsilis, sumptuous and lavish, as the friendly and prompt service of the pullum uenditoris (chicken sellers). The chicken was so tender and tasty that you can deduct that they were young unmarried, sexy chicks. The deep-fry Yucca that accompanied the Peruvian chicken's deceased body was close to a heavenly gaudens; however, the Inca Cola (soda drink - nitri) had more Cola than Inca.

After this agitative and delicious meal, I quickly resumed my trip immersing my volvendis vehiculum (car) with myself inside, into the fast rat thoroughfare so appellated I-95. Since I was not able to wash my hands, my steering wheel absorbed the leftover greases and the magic and secretive Inca dressings, giving me back in a gentle breeze the aroma of the Pullum Peruviani. I was the happiest rat on the road while enjoying licking my long and twisted mustaches for the rest of my trip back home.

- “I want there to be no peasant in my kingdom so poor that he cannot have a chicken in his pot every Sunday” - Henry IV.

  • Visited May 2013
    • 4 of 5 stars Value
    • 3 of 5 stars Atmosphere
    • 5 of 5 stars Service
    • 5 of 5 stars Food
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