I hate to be an iconoclast but the Seychelles really didn't do it for me. The islands are lush because it rains a lot, something the tourist blurb forgets to tell you. The honeymooners pretend it's all great because they don't want to look like mugs. If you need guaranteed sunshine, laughs and relaxation you'd really be better off going to Spain or Greece.
The local Seychelles people are alien to customer service, it's just not in their blood so service always feels awkward and uncomfortable or even worse faked.
The Kempinski is a resort hotel whose delights also passed me by. It started by arriving very early morning in July in a freezing shower of rain to be met by two members of staff dressed inappropriately in white cheesecloth uniforms and straw hats offering a cold drink and a cold flannel. Just what you need on a freezing cold morning. Didn't anyone think to offer a hot drink and a hot towel?
I will say that the room was gorgeous. You'll love the rooms, which is just as well as this is where you will be most of the time. Seaview or pond view, they are all really nice and spacious.
Someone may need to measure the swimming pool as it doesn't appear to be an Olympic size pool. Short by about 3 feet. It also doesn't really look like a pool. I'm guessing it was just a water feature in front of the restaurant in a previous incarnation. Do you really want to swim right under the noses of people eating?
The restaurant too has hygiene issues. I found a 3 inch long human hair baked into my bread roll. I got a £5 discount when I complained. I had to insist on a discount. The surly, miserable waiter treated it as if 'no one else complains about the hair in the rolls'.
Also regarding hygiene the friendly pool attendant cut open a fresh coconut for us using a knife out of his pocket. He didn't wash his hands or wash the knife. The holiday could have been ruined with serious tummy bugs had we not secretly put the coconut in the nearest bin.
The evening entertainment is miserable. That's a fact.
The general manager was unfriendly and cold. I bet he hates all of us.
If this was my honeymoon I guess I'd be divorced by now. Admittedly, there are better hotels on the island.
If I was going back to Seychelles for some reason I would definitely stay somewhere else.
- Official Description (provided by the hotel):
- A world apart, yet within reach! The Kempinski Seychelles Resort – Baie Lazare is the ideal location for those seeking an intimate getaway or an island adventure. Baie Lazare offers an intimate and exotic tropical paradise surrounded by untouched natural beauty. It is a tidal beach protected by a reef around 200 meters out. The Resort is tucked only half hours’ drive from the International Airport and only 40 minutes away from the capital, Victoria. ... more less
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- Also Known As:
- Kempinski Seychelles Resort Mahe Island