“I'd rather stay in a N. Korean labor camp.......”
Okay, maybe the title is a bit of an exaggeration, but not by much. I've stayed in this wretched excuse for a hotel for a total of about 3 weeks within the past year and a half. Business trips, of course, because no sane person who could actually choose to stay here would do so. The Sheraton down the road is a far more hospitable and comfortable place to stay...... But our company bean counters dictated the Marriott.
Let's see, where to begin? The lobby is a throwback to the disco era. Lots of big soft lounge sofas and chairs, all that is missing is are a disco ball hanging from the ceiling, some bean bag chairs, and some bead curtains separating the rooms. Lot of orange and other earthy tones, mixed with turquoise and pinks, reminds me of a scene from the movie "Shaft". The bar is fine, I mean, they have plenty of alcohol which is a good thing because you'll need a lot to overlook the other flaws. The elevators are as truculent as New York cabbies, meaning maybe they will pay attention to your request for a pick up, but they are just as likely to pretend they never saw your call button.
Restaurants? Sure - a steak joint and amazingly a sushi joint - in Kansas. And try to imagine the quality of sushi in Kansas..... Yeah, it's that bad. God only knows where they got the fish, but given that the nearest ocean is about 1,500 miles away, try to picture the journey and you can get a pretty good idea as to why I recommend you avoid the sushi at all costs.The breakfast buffet is, however, not too shabby and since I've eaten there at least 2 dozen times, I feel like I should know. They do make a darn good Denver omelet, and the staff can be quite pleasant - especially if they know you are a "business prisoner".
The rooms are spacious as only rooms in the mid-west can be. Compared to a mid-town Manhattan hotel, you feel like you are sleeping in the New Orleans Superdome. But that's where the fun ends folks. The beds are as tired as the springs in the front seat of a 73 Chevy Impala, and the bath fixtures look like something out of your aunt Mildred's guest bath - you know, the one that hasn't been remodeled since "All in the Family" was the top rated TV show in America. The carpets are threadbare in some places and the AC systems are from the Apollo moon mission era. The view out the windows - regardless of the season - is as uninspiring as a scene from Schindler's List. Gray, cold, unmoving, insipid and downright depressing. A few scattered commercial buildings, a highway, and some grass that even in the middle of spring is a mottled hue of tan with some tufts of green here and there.
Rumor has it there is a small gym in the hotel, but darned if I could find it. Since it's mostly flat out there, taking a few laps of the neighborhood isn't a terrible compromise but the scenery is numbingly dull. For excitement there's a Applebee's across the street, and for you business travelers, a Kinkos/FedEx shop too in case you need to make copies of an important presentation.
Okay, so in summary, maybe it's not as bad as a North Korean labor camp, but since I've never been to North Korea I can only imagine the parallels. If you really have no other options (say the interstates are closed because of a major snow storm) then this place is a serviceable option. Otherwise, run fast, run far....... Try the Sheraton up the road.
There are none. Seriously. None.
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This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.