We went to Miami for a conference for my husband as well as a vacation. Due to the large conference, there weren't many hotel rooms available anywhere. Unfortunately we didn't have much choice other than staying at Colony. I'll just give you the rundown. I don't expect much, and am fine staying in Holiday Inn's etc. but this place was pretty close to the equivalent of staying in a hostel other than having your own room/bathroom.
The lobby is ugly and the people working at the desk can be lazy about calling you a cab or getting you things requested, although they were pretty nice. The elevator fits 2-4 people tops so plan on walking up and down stairs to access your room. The hallways for the rooms are almost like you are in the shining - being dark, musty, and old.
Upon walking into your room, the humidity in the room hits you. There is no ventilation in the rooms so it is thick and musty air 24/7. It definitely smells of mildew. We couldn't get a queen room so we had to sleep in a double bed. The bedding is awful and super thin for a "comforter" but since it was so stuffy and warm (while still being mid 60's for highs outside) that worked out okay. Lucky for us there were no bed bugs, but when we walked in that was honestly a concern it was so run down. The room is super tiny and there isn't anywhere to sit other than on the bed. There was a mini-fridge that worked fine. The air conditioner unit never shut off, and we wouldn't have wanted it to, and thank goodness there was a ceiling fan for circulation.
The lighting in the room is horrendous. There is one lamp in the rooms with two double beds and it literally is the equivalent of a 15 watt lamp. At night you couldn't even tell if your socks were black or blue. There was nowhere to put anything as far as a luggage rack, etc., so we ended up sitting our luggage on the extra bed. There was a closet with a few hangers, so that was okay. When we got there our iron was broken but luckily they were able to give us a different one. The TV is huge and works fine, so I guess that's one redeeming quality.
If you're looking for a "view", all you're going to get is the tiny alleyway between the hotel and the building next to it and/or views of rundown windows next door. It's even hard to get any natural light into the room, plus the windows don't open.
The bathroom was probably my least favorite part of the entire experience. There is a pedestal sink with no storage what so ever. There was a "shelf" above the toilet but it was leaning and anything we sat there would fall off. It was too narrow to fit much anyways. We had to put any toiletries on top of the toilet. The lighting in the bathroom was abysmal, similar to the room. The one mirror in the entire hotel room was barely large enough for one person to see in it let alone two, but that didn't matter because two people couldn't possibly fit in the bathroom anyways. When showering, there was also no shelf in there, so any shower needs had to also rest on top of the toilet and you had to reach out to grab it, unless you wanted to sit your items on the floor of the disgusting shower, no thank you. The first day, when we tried to shower, we literally thought there was no hot water, only to figure out towards the end of the shower that it takes 15 minutes for the water to get hot, and once it does, it's scalding and you can't adjust it. That was quite an ordeal. You have to wake up, turn on the shower and then do something else for 15 minutes while it warms up. At least its a rainfall shower head so you can step to the side of the scalding hot water to shower. What a joke.
I'm sure there were more negatives but that's all I can recall at the moment. At least we weren't in our room much. I would only ever recommend this place to someone I despised, because it really shouldn't even be allowed to be called a hotel room.
- Official Description (provided by the hotel):
- One of the most photographed Art Deco hotels along famed South Beach, The Colony Hotel is a renovated 1939 hotel that offers an intoxicating ambiance and fun in the sun for guests who just want to get away to relax and enjoy all that Miami Beach has to offer. Guests are within walking distance to South Beach boutique shops, restaurants, nightclubs, salon/spas, other world-famous sites like the former Versace Mansion and much more. We cater to visitors looking to escape the structured corporate environment and the vacationer who wants to come to relax and enjoy sun-filled days and fun filled nights. Everything that people enjoy about South Beach is literally at the doorstep of the Colony Hotel. ... more less
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- Also Known As:
- Colony Hotel Miami Beach
- Colony Miami Beach