What an experience the Kinondo Retreat is!! This is really a place to chill out & relax with great service but before the review a couple of points I have noticed on Trip Advisor about and around this place; the first thing is insects - Kenya is a hot & humid place and the Kinondo Retreat is not a hotel as you have a suite which faces the pool so there is no reception or anything like that so you may get visitors from ants, millipedes etc which come underneath the door. If truth be told I thought this may be a problem as I've read some stories about this but it was certainly not the case - there were a few ants about and we had a visit from the odd millipede which were placed on books and shown the door. I've also read about the road to the resort and they're all true - the last three miles or so is like a cart track with rocks appearing in the road which the driver skirts round and you get thrown about a bit - hardly the resort's fault so just get your seat belt on and enjoy the ride!!
We stayed in one of the suites at the Kinondo Retreat which has a double bed with a mosquito net around it. You have what they call a "love bed" also in the room which is like a big lounger and great to relax on. There are no chests of drawers just somewhere to place your suitcases and clothes if you wish to unpack along with a few hangers to hang your clothes on. We did not unpack as you will probably be in your swimwear/beachwear during the day and we just used the hangers for our trousers/shirts for the night and we found that this worked absolutely fine. You have a bathroom with a shower and there is one small oddity in that the shower works by a small immersion heater at the rear of your suite which they switch off at some point in the late morning/early afternoon to save electricity so if you wish for a shower during this time either ask them to switch it on or nip round the back to turn it on - it only takes about 20 minutes or so to get a nice hot shower but if there is someone next door to you (two suites are attached together) the heater feeds both of them so someone next door may get the hot water first - again just wait a little while. We found the accommodation basic but it was perfectly suitable and clean as Jessita ( I think I've spelt it right) does a wonderful job of cleaning your room - there is no quick flick round with a duster as the room is properly cleaned every day and it takes her about 45 minutes or so and occasionally you will come back to see that she has decorated your bed with some flower petals on it!!
The service from your "butlers" is absolutely fantastic. You can choose to have your meals brought to you to enjoy on your patio area or eat by the pool (which we did). The food is freshly prepared by Joshua and Said (the chefs - apologies again for any misspellings) and is A1 - these guys would not be out of place in some London restaurants. The presentation of the food is great and is delicious. Breakfast is served when you get up in the morning and there is no set time so if you've overdone the wine/beer the night before and don't get up until 11 it is no problem. The chef comes to see you about 11or so to see what you would like to eat if you are on the all inclusive option from the extensive lunchtime menu and they will even visit you on the beach to take your order as Joshua "hunted" us out one day to see what we wanted for lunch. They will then see you again in the afternoon with the menu for the evening which is four courses plus tea/coffee and if there is anything you don't like they ask you what they can do for you instead.
While we were there we were served by William, Jonathan and Jallis (apologies again for spelling) and you get such wonderful, friendly, and courteous service. We were shown where the fridges were so if they were not around we could help ourselves to drinks. Doris (the reservations manager) came round every day or so to make sure everything was ok and we had some wonderful chats with her - a very pleasant lady. George is your man on the beach and if you want any of their day trips he will organise this for you but there is no pressure at all to go on these trips. The beach is accessed by a short walk through the forest and if you tell Geoge you want to go to the beach he will take sunbeds down for you. The whole place is kept in good nick by Wilbur who is the gardener/handyman and so you feel safe at night there is a guard who looks after the place and just for that bit extra security he has two dogs with him who roam the place but unfortunately I did not get his name. Mineh is the masseuer who will come to see you when you arrive to offer her services but again there is no pressure from her - Sally did have three massages from her and she came back feeling fully refreshed and the price was great (1,500 Kenyan schillings which worked out to about £13.00 - great value).
Do not come to the Kinondo Retreat if you want to be on the go all day - it is a place to relax, chill out and spend time with your loved one and we found it absolutely fantastic. What bliss it was to have no TV, radio or newspapers for our two weeks there and we were made to feel so welcome and at home by everybody there. They make you feel very special and nothing is too much trouble. To William, Jallis, Jonathan, George, Doris, Joshua, Said, Jessita, Wilbur, Mineh and the guard - thank you so much for a wonderful honeymoon and apologies again if I've spelt your names wrong. We may be richer in our pockets over here but I don't think we are in our souls; your attention to us and your customer service made our honeymoon so special and we will never forget your kindness.
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.