I bought three groupons for Azotea Suites.
The first I used for just one night while my boyfriend was in town. He got there before I did. "This is probably the worst place we've ever stayed at," he told me over the phone. I thought he was exaggerating as we had stayed in some pretty dodgy places before.
But when I got there he was asleep so I went out with some friends and didn't see him again till the next morning. When I finally crawled into bed, I did notice that the pillows were flat, the bed hard, and the blanket quite small. Plus the furniture looked shabby. (Apparently, it was the look they were going for.)
Anyway, my boyfriend complained that there was no water in the shower and that he had to crouch down under the faucet. When I complained to management about this later on, they said that there was some switch that had to be turned on but that the water was working just fine.
I didn't even bother to look inside the bathroom and just checked out and went home.
Since I hadn't seen how bad it really was, I booked again for one night when I had to be in Makati for some early appointment. Because I had written a letter of complaint, they said that they would upgrade me for free during my next stay.
Except that when I got there, the manager didn't know anything about it so he wanted to charge me for the upgrade. He relented when I told him that I didn't ask for it and that it was offered to me for free, but I found it strange that he had to take my word for it, without any official notice from whomever handles their reservations.
Anyway, the two boys brought me upstairs to my "suite" at the "penthouse".
In my previous e-mail of complaint to them, I remarked that the furniture looking shabby. They replied that it was meant to be that way. Something about old Philippine style. I guess because the word "azotea" is a word that was used a lot by our grandparents, they wanted to evoke the feeling of being at your grandmother's place. If your grandmother was a prostitute, that is, and into zebra print and mirrors, apart from the dusty shabby-chic cabinets.
But taste is relative so I didn't bother to comment about it again, although I thought I should mention it here.
Back to the two boys and the room.
While showing me the bathroom, I noticed some pink stains on the toilet seat. "Is that really the color of that seat?" I asked. One of the boys took a piece of toilet paper to it and wiped it. It came off! Ew! "Okay, you can't just wipe off that grime, you have to get a scrub and some detergent and scrub this bathroom clean," I told them.
Before they left, I asked them to show me how the shower worked. It didn't. There was no water coming out from it. So I told them that they should probably get me another room. They scooted out of there quickly.
Since there were two toilets in the zebra suite, I went to use the one in the living room. It was even worse than the one in the bedroom! It was pock-marked with urine stains! GROSS.
I tried calling the management but it turned out that the telephone in the room was only for decor. I was told later on that none of the phones in the rooms work.
So I went downstairs to the office where I found a whole battalion of their staff sitting around. The manager was bent over his phone. "I'm sorry, but isn't anyone going to see about the problems in my room?" I asked. The manager jumped out of his chair. He told me that he was looking for a new room for me but that was clearly not the case. When I complained about the water, he quickly accompanied me to the room to show me how it worked.
Apparently, there are certain buttons that you have to press to make the shower work but I wondered why only the manager knew this and none of the other staff did and why it wasn't Standard Operating Procedure for them to explain this to guests.
The two boys were hard at work, scrubbing the bathroom, so I took a deep breath and let everything go. Of course, they were wearing their leather shoes while they were cleaning the bathroom so they still ended up muddying the floors.
I asked who normally cleans the room and they said that they're on rotation so one of the others should have done it earlier.
After this, you'd think I would have burned the third voucher but, no, I thought that if I said something, that maybe they'd get it right the next time.
I had another early morning appointment in Makati so I booked the last voucher. I sent them an e-mail about the urine-stained toilets and asked if they could please make sure that the bathrooms were clean this time.
I got there. Same drill.
"You have to pay for the upgrade."
"I didn't ask for it. They've upgraded me for free."
The manager turned over the keys to, yes, two boys and instructed them to make sure the room was clean. I thought to myself, "Isn't it a bit too late for that now?" But I held my tongue and followed the boys.
As soon as one of them opened the bathroom door, it was obvious to both of us what was wrong. (Okay, warning, this gets really gross.) The drain was uncovered and all the way from where I was, I could see that the drain was covered with hair. Ugh. That is one of the grossest sights for me. I turned my head and the guy went in and dealt with it. Or so I thought.
"Did you seriously just cover that drain? You do know that is clogged and that it will overflow when I use the shower?"
He didn't seem to understand. "What else is wrong with the bathroom, ma'am?"
"Okay, let's see," I turned back to the shower.
1. The towels have obviously been used and haven't been changed.
2. The toiletries are scattered about so you might want to arrange that.
3. And there's no toilet paper.
"We've run out of toilet paper."
"That's not an excuse. There's a 7-11 next door. Who cleans this place anyway?"
They gave me the same answer as the other boys. "Somebody else."
The boys left. I went out. When I returned, the towels were changed and there was toilet paper but the toiletries were still askew but that wasn't really important.
I decided to take a shower. I pressed the buttons the manager showed me. No water. And, of course, the phone-decor was still there but it was still not working. I called the manager on my mobile phone. He sent up a different pair of boys and they worked they shower.
"Oh, great, thanks!"
But they shut off the water again.
"No, please leave it on. I want to make sure that I won't have to call you again."
They couldn't get it to work again. After a few minutes, they figured it out. There's also a knob that you have to turn, apparently. Geez.
The guys left and I got into the shower. Sure enough, the floor started to flood and it felt grimy underneath my feet. Argh!
I felt really gross afterwards and felt even worse when it dawned on me that it was most likely that the sheets and pillow cases hadn't been changed. I was well aware that I had lost all self-respect by not leaving but it was late and I was tired and I slept with my clothes on.
The next day, I woke up sick. I must have picked up a bug in the room. I threw up in the bathroom even if my stomach was empty. I checked out too late and was sick for the next few days, down with a stomach bug.
STAY AWAY FROM THIS PLACE UNLESS YOU TOTALLY HAVE NO REGARD FOR YOURSELF.
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.