Before I start, I want to make it clear that I have tried my hardest not to sound like a whingey stuck up lady. It's been hard, but hopefully this gives you an idea of what you're in for!!! Also, to be clear, I choose this hotel as a last minute decision to fly down to Melbourne for a show at Etihad Stadium. It was close by, was an ibis brand and had a nice website. What could go wrong?
Well for a start, first impressions weren't much to go on. Hopped out of the taxi and somehow only just maganed to make it up the steps to check in with a heavy suitcase. Although I have since learnt this is because of a heritage building, so I'll let it slide.
Eventually got to the lobby, found a family waiting around. They had checked in but was told the room wasn't ready. I would've totally understood this if it was like 11am in the morning, but it was after 2pm, and clearly past the specified check in time. I got into line, was only the second person but it seemed to take at least twenty minutes. Lady started to check me in, confirming my details and then suddenly pulled out her phone and made a call to housekeeping. 5 minutes later when she eventually got off the phone, she asked her colleague if she wouldn't mind finishing my check in!! Now this lady tapped something into her computer and says "A room for Kirsty?" NO. MY NAME IS ROSE. Skip forward another 5 minutes and I finally have my key card!!!! Oh, and the family waiting for the room still hadn't moved. I walked further down the lobby and was overcome by a damp smell. Waited for the lift up to level 5, they were slow, old, small and smelt different.
Opened the door to my room, and almost burst into tears. Not what I was expecting from an ibis hotel at all. Was extremely small, had a weird looking heater/cooling system thing. The bed was alright and comfortable. Yay things were starting to look up. I was shocked to see there was no minibar, or infact room service. There was nowhere to put my suitcase (most hotels have a shelf/stand) so that ended up on the floor.
Walked into the bathroom, which was this open plan kind of....thing. First thing that grabbed my attention, the weird funky smell it has emitting from it. The next....the toilet! Yes that delightful object. I'm sorry, maybe this is a normal thing now, and maybe I am the only one in Australia who does not have this, but what kind of purpose does a toilet serve without a lid??? It is actually the most unhygienic thing I have ever seen. Moving on to the sink, it had no vanity, so nowhere to really out my toiletries, do my hair and makeup etc. the shower was ok, good water pressure, had no door or curtain or anything so it made it interesting.
I wish I knew how to include photos (I am on my iPad) to show you how spectacular my view was. I mean come on, most hotels have a view of something...a car park with a nice garden would've even been nicer. To see the outside world, I had to strain my neck out the broken window (more on that soon) and that is something I would not want to do on the 5th floor if I was afraid of heights. My view was of the fire stairs and the ground below. When I say view, it was a 5cm gap that I was able to look through.
The window. I didn't take much notice of it when I first arrived because of the shock I was in. I practically dumped all my stuff and then went and calmed my self down with some retail therapy. After seeing Taylor Swift at Etihad Stadium, I arrived back at the hotel at around 11:30pm. It was then I realised I had left my window open. That's ok, no big deal. I'll just close it.....20 minutes later, various swear words and the window is still open. That's ok, I wanted a broken window in my room anyway. Especially when there is a nightclub next door that was just started to get into full swing, and when I say that I mean loud music and louder people. This wouldn't have been so bad IF I COULD HAVE CLOSED THE DAMN WINDOW.
I eventually got to sleep at 2am, only to be woke at 4am to I have no idea what it was. It might have been the noisy lifts that my room was also right next to, or hey maybe the electrical switchroom, but whatever it was, it was loud enough to keep me awake. Considering the time, I wasn't about to go and investigate. Fell back asleep and woke up to my alarm at 7:30 to give me enough time to shower, pack, and maybe go downstairs and try out the buffet breakfast that was included with my room.
Luckily I had packed my own gluten free bread. Most hotels seem to supply this nowadays but I normally pack some just in case. I walked into the restaurant expecting to see a nice selection (my last stay at ibis had a great range) but all that was out was tea, coffee, a few different cereals, yoghurt and some fruit. Oh and some bread for toasting. There were no staff, no one to check who you were, so hey I could've easily been a random off the street scoring a free breakfast!!!
The best thing about my stay was checkout. Handed my card over, and the lady told me to have a good day.
I'm sorry this was so long and sounded like a narrative, but I would like others to be aware of this hotel. I tried my hardest not to let it spoil my weekend in Melbourne, and my night at taylor swift, and you know what, it hasn't. If you've got this far and are still reading, well done.
Ps. I paid $184 for the night. Breakfast included. Double bed. Hmmmm
To sum up:
The good - comfortable bed, and close to southern cross station, which is exactly what I needed.
The bad - read the previous 5000 characters and find out!!!
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC.