Hi Poppa and Daffy2

I couldn't agree more. The Reefs simply is not the place for young children. That is why my husband and I go there because it is less "children friendly". I know in the past when I have stayed at Cambridge they flat out said 'no children 6 or under unless attended to by a nanny'. I'm not sure if they still had that policy. When we were visiting the Reefs last September, there were a few small children there. A couple did have a nanny and the others did not. They seemed to all be pretty well behaved-but still-there's nothing like getting woken from a nap or have a lovely dinner interuped by a crying or whinning child. There are other hotels that are better suited for children. Other guests last year had the same thoughts.

Hi,

Just to take the opposite viewpoint for the moment as being a recent guest of the Reefs myself and having a small child (<1yr old). I'm fully aware of the "R&R" factor when deciding on a high end resort like the Reefs and wanting some peace and quiet. With that said (IMO) it's not the responsibility of the Reefs or any other resort to watch or discipline an excited child, it's the parents. There were a few times that our little one did yell around the pool or down by the ocean and we simply put her back in the stroller and wheeled her away from the other guests. This took all of 5 minutes to do and certainly did not interupt any of the adult nap times that we witnessed. A question that I would ask is what would you do about 30 something people jumping off of the rocks in the ocean? Could this be classified as distrubing or intrusive as well? Would you go to the front desk and complain about them making too much noise as well? Personally, I felt it was extremely fun and look forward to trying it again on our next trip to the Reefs.

We were extremely sensitive to the other guests as were many families (while I was there) and made sure to dine at 6:30pm so as not to interfere with the romance appeal of the resort itself. As for the staff of this resort they go above and beyond their duties in making an enjoyable retreat for both couples with and without the little ones. This is the first resort ever (outside of Disney) that I've been to that can make the child laugh and have a great time despite being a little in awe of the new surroundings, (thanks again to Caroline, Dwayne, the Roving Scotsman ;), David at the desk etc). Possibly the new management will consider your "for the good of all" comment and decide that the good of all guest would be better served by not putting a policy into effect that excludes one group of clientele. There are parents out there that have extremely well behaved children and like traveling with them.

For any other readers out there to this posting please make sure that this 'Kid Friendly' resort doesn't become a reason for you not to go. They really do provide the best service to all guests both young and old whether its searching for peace and quiet or an overall enjoyable memory.

Thanks.

DWB959

DWB959, I'm with you on this. It is up to the parents to control their children. We have travelled a lot with our daughter ever since she was an infant, and to many high-end resorts (many that are heads-and-shoulders above any in Bermuda). It sounds like we're similar in that we are certainly take others into consideration and we have displayed that attitude with our child since Day 1. Yes, the shushing is also annoying. For that reason if anything ever does come up, which is rarely, we leave the room and deal with it in private. There are well behaved children out there and, more importantly, considerate parents who control their children.

I guess if Poppa wouldn't consider taking his children to a resort, then he must fall into the category of those who will not control their children.

As with any generalisation, you cannot lump all of us together.

By all means, hotels have the right to declare themselves as "adults only". That is fine; families can go elsewhere. Likewise if they do not have an "adults only" policy, then those looking to avoid children can also go elsewhere.

We were once at an excellent resort that had an good compromise: The Datai in Malaysia. They have one "adults only" pool up near the main building and an "anyone goes" pool way down by the beach, both well separated from each other. This works out really well for all.

By all means, hotels have the right to declare themselves as "adults only". That is fine; families can go elsewhere. Likewise if they do not have an "adults only" policy, then those looking to avoid children can also go elsewhere.

We were once at an excellent resort that had an good compromise: The Datai in Malaysia. They have one "adults only" pool up near the main building and an "anyone goes" pool way down by the beach, both well separated from each other. This works out really well for all.

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Hi Surface Travel,

Couldn't agree more on the fact that hotels do and should have the right to be "adults only". However in the case of the Reefs it really would be a shame to even entertain a stricter childrens policy or to exclude young adults (and hence their parents) from this particular resort . The Reefs really is the standard that other Bermudian accomodations should be measured by. After staying there I wouldn't even consider another Bermuda resort for future travel.

Regardless of any current policy, (and mind you the current children policy is just fine) you could geniunely see that the staffers and management loved having guests of all ages around and in a parents mind that really hits home and becomes part of the relaxation factor! Just maybe some guests need to remember what it was like to be a child and possibly take their nap time back to their hotel room if it's that disrupting :)

All the best!

DWB959

Hi DWB959

I don't think making the Reefs an "adult only" resort is the answer or necessary. It is true that it is the responsibility of the parent to supervise their child and to take actions necessary not to offend other guests. I am 50 and have traveled to Bermuda many times. My first was my honeymoon at the Reefs in 1979. I have taken my children to Bermuda a few times and have enjoyed the island with them-however-not at the Reefs. I would not be comfortable being afraid that at any moment the children may offend or disrupt someones peace and quiet. We all know that children are wonderful-and precious-but sometimes, there are those times when they can be trying. It's just their nature.

Perhaps when you reach the age where your children are older and doing their "own thing" , you will understand better. We have all been there.

Please spare us the condescending "when you reach our age" pearls of wisdom. We're young enough to remember what it was like to travel without children. We're also old enough to know when we get irritated by other people's misbehaving children and old enough to ensure our children don't do the same to others.

Like Poppa, if you were afraid of your children disrupting others, then you must not have been able to control them. We have absolutely no qualms whatsoever of taking our child to the best of quiet resorts, hotels, posh restaurants, movies, the theatre, and concerts, and we do it frequently. We are never nervous she will upset other people. The rare times it happens, we simply defuse the situation quickly and quietly; no big deal. Because she has been exposed to these environments so often, she knows how to behave.

It is possible, you know, to have happy well behaved children. They have to be brought up properly and treated correctly. There are thousands of books on the subject. You can see whole classrooms (from good quality schools) of quiet well-behaved children out on field trips. It's not the norm, I'll grant you that, but it is possible and it does exist.

Our vacations are far more likely to be disrupted by loud groups of obnoxious adults who just don't care about others' enjoyment. It's all the more annoying because they are old enough to know better.

I find it amusing that those responders with the 'perfect' children are assuming that myself and WhiteDiamondScoot cannot control our children and that is why we never would take them to a resort such as The Reefs.

By the time my wife and I first traveled to The Reefs my children were already young adults, were in college with summer schedules that did not coincide Mom&Dad's vacation plans.

Furthermore my statement of not bringing young children to this upscale property was based on what I noticed at the property, more mature, in age, couples looking for a bit of luxury.

To me this includes no <1 year olds!

And to those who made all those great assumptions of mine and others parenting skills I would like to remind you of the adage 'never assume anything'.

Thanks to all who have replied, I hope you and the kids have fun in Malaysia.

Poppa

Thank you. We will have fun in Malaysia, in Bermuda (perhaps at the Reefs), and anywhere else.

I have been to the Reefs before I had children and went to the website to read the new children's policy

thereefs.com/roomsrates/…childpolicy.shtml

Poppa, this is the most restrictive policy I have ever seen at a resort that "welcomes children of all ages". I do not think management can do much more other than make the property adults only. The Reefs is trying to keep everyone happy, and with a small property that is not an easy feat.

I'm sure you've read how many of the luxury Caribbean resorts are now actively soliciting families--it's the big trend in the market. I don't think there's even a price point you could hit where you will not see loads of families. I've been to resorts much pricier than the Reefs (with my preschooler!) and the price does not discourage families from coming. It's just the way it is now.

As for ill-behaved children and irresponsible parents--there are inconsiderate people everywhere. Just because you're paying $500/night does not mean you are less inclined to run into idiots.